Sunday, May 09, 2010

You don't develop courage by being happy...

“You don't develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.”

So says the quote attributed to the Greek Philosopher Epicurus and it is true. For many of us we don't have courage especially when it comes to our relationships. We let people that claim to love us abuse us emotionally and at times physically. We make excuses for them, blame or own behavior or jokingly talk about needing to find the best testosterone boosters out there to somehow make us more courageous.

I used to be an emotional doormat, going out of my way to give, and give and give some more even when nothing was given in return. It's a hard cycle to break and it may end up making some relationships no longer possible. It was easier for me to give in, but the damage I did to myself in constantly folding was worse than what I've gone through in cutting off friends and family members who are not willing to accept that relationships need to be based on mutual respect and realistic expectations of what a person can give.

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